Hey.

I have this sudden urge to blog about my feelings and thoughts. So here i go..

I've been moody & depressed since that day. I saw something that i shouldn't see, but i saw it & that's that. Those words that came out from you tore me apart. I want to forget what i saw, but i just can't. I can't bear the pain i'm feeling everyday.

Thanks for those dreadful truths.
Thanks for the pain&sorrow.
Thanks for the tears&anger.
Thanks alot for the broken heart.

I feel like seeing you everyday, but at the same time i don't too cause i'm afraid i might cry or weep. It hurts alot knowing that you could have been mine, but you slipped away and into her arms. Watching you from distance, secretly looking at you. I wonder if you know that you're the reason why i go to school early morning. Watching you from afar, i learn that i can never have that place in your heart. Everytime i see you, you're always with that girl. That girl you used to love, or maybe you still do.

One day, my phone rang. I saw your house phone calling on my handphone's screen. I thought it's your sister, but then it's you. I kind of freaked out. I didn't expect you to call, but you actually called. I was surprised and excited, i guess. I can't believe how that one phone call of yours can make my heart beat so very fast and i actually felt better, not so sad anymore. Ok, i'll admit it. I miss you very badly. All those heartbreaking thoughts just dissapeared when i heard your voice again. We talked for awhile. Maybe just for awhile, but to me. It's a moment i can never forget and i don't want to forget. A moment I'll treasure forever. You even said that three words. Maybe you didn't mean it. I know you're just joking around, but it still made me melt inside. There's butterflies in my tummy from the very start i heard your voice again. I was really happy. After you hung up, i miss you once again. Eventhough it's just awhile after you hung up, but i miss you already.

I just want you to know that, i still like you and i always will. I've been thinking and i wonder if we could ever be more than just friends eventhough i know it'll never really come true, but a girl can dream right? *sighs*

Ok ok, I should stop talking about all this stuff before i breakdown and start crying. ='(